On Forgiveness and Pride

Hello Everyone!

So thoughts on this week, We have so much potential inside of us. The potential to become gods... do we think about that. When we are tempted to sin do we remember that we are destined for so much greater than that brief moment is worth? We saw miracles this week. Sister Liao and I Tangier accepted a baptismal date, Alex was able to finally understand why the atonement is important, we were able to find people to teach when we prayed with specific intent. I gave a talk on Sunday that was almost more for me then it was for anyone else....

It was on forgiveness. I had about 24 hours to think about what I was going to say and what came to my mind was a few things that have really impacted me this week. The first is something I over heard someone say while sister Liao and I were street contacting. "If I don't get this assignment in I'll never forgive myself!" ... Isn't that the saddest thing you've ever heard? That sentence basically conveys the following: I'm going to base my entire self worth on this one moment in time. I'm going to be so prideful that I'm not going to let Christ help me and I'm going to let a little piece of His Suffering be in vain just so I can be self imposedly miserable. If we want repentance then we need to forgive ourselves. You've heard this before but there's a lot of power in letting your sins be washed away. We have our agency and that means that we can so choose to punish ourselves when we really don't need to. Something else that I've been thinking about is how often people say these two similar phrases to me. "You need to forgive yourself." and "You need to be patient with yourself." Something else that I learned this week is that patience is a form of continual forgiveness. If we can be patient with ourselves and the people around us it is similar to offering up a continual forgiveness to ourselves and to others. If we want to have continual repentance and forgiveness from God then we likewise should be continually forgiving others... Patience.

I have to admit I haven't been very patient with myself this week. Not with the language, not with the scriptures, and not with myself. But coming to the end of this week there was a simple and powerful words said to me at different points. "Your Chinese has gotten so much better from when we first met." , "Thank you for coming to church, when you walk in I can tell you're good missionaries because it's like sunlight." , "You are always able to answer their questions in the scriptures, even in 2 Nephi, you're doing great." These little lights really changed my week they changed me. I'm here to serve others but I need to forgive myself and not hold those little things. The atonement covers everything. That includes me.

So yes it was a really good week. I was sick a couple of days and nearly lost my voice. (That was distressing) but I have felt so blessed this week. God is really behind this work and we can and will see miracles when we reach out to others.

I love you all so much and I hope you know I'm praying for you and that I in turn feel so blessed for your prayers.

God lives.

-Sister Skinner